Ever hear a software provider say they had the most “scalable, feature-rich application for the enterprise with global integration using web services through a robust, web-enabled platform while adhering to best-in-class workflow technology.”
What the hell is that?
It is meaningless; overused and way too broad for anyone to truly understand. I have never met someone in the software or software-as-a-service business that doesn’t use these words; even yours truly is guilty of such vocabulary abuse in the digital asset management market.
Do software providers really think people understand these words or do they just use them to sound smart? If the providers think they sound smart, an honest self-evaluation would reveal a glaring ignorance cleverly hidden behind a smoke screen of fancy vocabulary. If providers don’t correlate these words with the customer situation they are not helping matters, they are wasting time.
So if someone wants to waste your time with a software presentation using meaningless and overused words, then at least you can have fun with it. Using the classic game of Connect 4, use the chart below in a software presentation. Whenever the provider uses one of these words without proper explanation of what it means and how it can help you, color in the square. When you get four squares vertically, horizontally, or diagonally, you have officially wasted your time with that provider.
If you are in a committee buying situation, mix up the words for each attendee and bring it to the meeting. First one with four squares in a row is the first one to realize they are wasting their time…congrats.